Human Being, Not Human Doing
Have you ever had one of those weeks where it went by like a flash and you don't remember much about it? That's what happened to me this week. Last Sunday, midday, I began to feel a little funny so I decided to take it easy and the more I took it easy the worse I felt, until by the evening it was clear I was sick. I don't know about you but I'm not great at being sick usually, but this time I fully embraced it! I watched a bunch of movies I have wanted to see, finished up some TV series, and slept a lot. That is until today! I guess I passed the threshold of my patience with being laid out and finally got sick of staring at the TV. You know what I mean? When you reach the end of what you are willing to tolerate?
I tell you this not for sympathy, but because I began to wonder why was I at the end of my patience with being sick? Was there something pressing that needed attending to? The answer is no. And, in fact, that is the answer all the time, that there is nothing pressing. It reminded me of something I heard awhile back in a book. The author said that the moment you die all the things you had in motion cease to be in motion, they just stop. This life of all the important responsibilities, tasks, and goals just stop. This hit me hard. This reminded me how unimportant all the things are that we deem important on the day to day.
Now, I'm not saying don't go after things, I want you to, if you want to, but not because they are proof that you have value in this life. You needn't do anything to have value in this life, your existence is enough. There is no certificate, degree, goal, or achievement that will give you any lasting value, that is a decision you must make from the inside. I am simply contemplating myself what the impatience is about, when I know that the list of to do's that I wanted to get to today will not be accomplished. Who is driving this need to get all these things accomplished and for what?
Maybe you can relate? Maybe your work life and home life are a whirlwind of activities and lists of things to get done? I know in my past life every single minute was accounted for and designed to create the "ideal life", the life that looks good from the outside (successful business, coaching sports, working out, playing tennis, creating play dates, dinner parties, holiday parties, houses, cars, elaborate trips, elaborate birthdays, private school, charity events, etc.).
So how come all I felt was like I was a machine, manufacturing "fun", to make experiences that were supposed to be meaningful? The reason was because I wasn't present during all that. I thought if I created the experiences that I would have a life, except what makes it a meaningful life is when we are aware of what we are doing, and why we are doing it (intention). This is what I help people discover, how to get intentional about your life and learn to be in the present moment. This life is beautiful when we are here to experience it, and I want to go on that journey with you. Until then, I will give up my impatience and go back to doing nothing, at least for today.
Peace,Erin "being vs. doing" Mac